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"There is no after to happiness. Happiness is now !" - Jeffery Gitomer

Monday, March 18, 2013

Time and Tide ... wait for none ...

Each of us has a bank. Its name is Time. Every morning it credits you with 86,400 seconds. Every night writes off as lost whatever of this you have failed to invest in good purpose. It carries over no balance. It allows no overdraft. Each day it opens a new account for you. Each night it burns the remains of the day. If you fail to use the day's deposits, the loss is yours.



To realise the value of one year, ask a student who failed a grade.
To realise the value of one month ask a mother who gave birth to a premature baby.
To realise the value of one week as the editor of a weekly newspaper.
To realise the value of one hour ask lovers who are waiting to meet.
To realise the value of one second ask a person who avoided an accident.
To realise the value of one millisecond ask the sports-person who won a silver medal.


Thursday, March 14, 2013

Questions to set you free !! Really ???


These questions have no right or wrong answers.
Because sometimes asking the right questions itself is the answer.
(Best if you read a few each day ... in case it seems overwhelming all at once !!)


Which is worse, failing or never trying?

If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don’t like and like so many things we don’t do?

When it’s all said and done, will you have said more than you’ve done?

What is the one thing you’d most like to change about the world?

If happiness was the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich?

Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing?

If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently?

To what degree have you actually controlled the course your life has taken?

Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things?

You’re having lunch with three people you respect and admire.  They all start criticizing a close friend of yours, not knowing she is your friend.  The criticism is distasteful and unjustified.  What do you do?

If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be?

Would you break the law to save a loved one?

Have you ever seen insanity where you later saw creativity?

What’s something you know you do differently than most people?

How come the things that make you happy don’t make everyone happy?

What one thing have you not done that you really want to do?  What’s holding you back?

Are you holding onto something you need to let go of?

If you had to move to a state or country besides the one you currently live in, where would you move and why?

Do you push the elevator button more than once?  Do you really believe it makes the elevator faster?

Would you rather be a worried genius or a joyful simpleton?

Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend?

Which is worse, when a good friend moves away, or losing touch with a good friend who lives right near you?

What are you most grateful for?

Would you rather lose all of your old memories, or never be able to make new ones?

Is is possible to know the truth without challenging it first?

Has your greatest fear ever come true?

Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset?  Does it really matter now?

What is your happiest childhood memory?  What makes it so special?

At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive?

If not now, then when?

If you haven’t achieved it yet, what do you have to lose?

Have you ever been with someone, said nothing, and walked away feeling like you just had the best conversation ever?

Why do religions that support love cause so many wars?

Is it possible to know, without a doubt, what is good and what is evil?

If you just won a million dollars, would you quit your job?

Would you rather have less work to do, or more work you actually enjoy doing?

Do you feel like you’ve lived this day a hundred times before?

When was the last time you marched into the dark with only the soft glow of an idea you strongly believed in?

If you knew that everyone you know was going to die tomorrow, who would you visit  call today ? What are you waiting for ?

Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by 10 years to become extremely attractive or famous?

What is the difference between being alive and truly living?

If we learn from our mistakes, why are we always so afraid to make a mistake?

What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you?

When was the last time you noticed the sound of your own breathing?

Whom do you love?  Have any of your recent actions openly expressed this love?

In 5 years from now, will you remember what you did yesterday?  What about the day before that?  Or the day before that?

Decisions are being made right now. The question is:  Are you making them for yourself, or are you letting others make them for you?




To all my girlfriends !!



A young wife sat on a sofa on a hot humid day, drinking iced tea and visiting her Mother. As they talked about life, about marriage, about the responsibilities of life and the obligations of adulthood, the mother clinked the ice cubes in her glass thoughtfully and turned a clear, sober glance upon her daughter. Don't forget your girlfriends, she advised, swirling the tea leaves to the bottom of her glass. They'll be more important as you get older. No matter how much you love your husband, no matter how much you love the children you’ll have, you are still going to need girlfriends. Remember to go places with them now and then; do things with them. And remember that ‘girlfriends’ are not only your friends, but your sisters, your daughters, and other relatives too. You'll need other women. Women always do.  What a funny piece of advice, the young woman thought. Haven't I just gotten married? Haven't I just joined the couple-world? I'm now a married woman, for goodness sake, a grownup, not a young girl who needs girlfriends!  Surely my husband and the family we'll start will be all I need to make my life worthwhile!' But she listened to her Mother; she kept contact with her girlfriends and made more each year. As the years tumbled by, one after another, she gradually came to understand that her Mom really knew what she was talking about. As time and nature work their changes and their mysteries upon a woman, girlfriends are the mainstays of her life.

Girlfriends bring you curry when you need help.

Girlfriends give advice when you ask for it. Sometimes you take it, sometimes you don't. 

Girlfriends don't always tell you that you're right, but they're usually honest.

Girlfriends still love you, even when they don't agree with your choices.

Girlfriends laugh with you, and you don't need canned jokes to start the laughter.

Girlfriends pull you out of jams.

Girlfriends help you get out of bad relationships.

Girlfriends help you look for a new apartment, help you pack, and help you move.

Girlfriends will give a party for your son or daughter when they get married or have a baby, in whichever order that comes!

Girlfriends are there for you, in an instant and when the hard times come.

Girlfriends listen when you lose a job or a friend.

Girlfriends listen when your children break your heart.

Girlfriends listen when your parents minds and bodies fail.

Girlfriends support you when the men in your life let you down.

Girlfriends help you pick up the pieces when men pack up and go.

Girlfriends rejoice at what makes you happy, and are ready to go out and kill what makes you unhappy.


Times passes. Life happens. Distance separates. Children grow up. Love waxes and wanes. Hearts break. Careers end. Jobs come and go. Colleagues forget favours. Men don't call when they say they will.  BUT girlfriends are there, no matter how much time and how many miles are between you.

Celebrate the Elegance of Womanhood !

                To ALL you beautiful women and to all the men who respect them !!



You can feel her love -
in the blessings of a grandmother,
in the divinity of a mother,
in the care of a sister,
in the warmth of a friend,
in the passion of a beloved,
in the dedication of a wife!
She is So Tough yet so Tender
So Naughty, So Charming, So Sharing, So Caring
She is a Woman !

                                               

                                               The Beauty of a Woman


The beauty of a women is not in
The clothes she wears
The figure she carries
Or the way she combs her hair.
The beauty of a woman
Must be seen from her eyes,
Because that is the doorway to her heart,
The place where love resides.
The beauty of a woman
Is not in a facial mole,
But true beauty in a woman
Is reflected in her soul.
It is the caring that she lovingly gives,
The passion that she shows,
The beauty of a woman
With passing years-only grows.



Stop and Hear the Music !


In Washington , DC , at a Metro Station, on a cold January morning in 2007, this man with a violin played six Bach pieces for about 45 minutes. During that time, approximately 2,000 people went through the station, most of them on their way to work. After about 3 minutes, a middle-aged man noticed that there was a musician playing. He slowed his pace and stopped for a few seconds, and then he hurried on to meet his schedule. 

About 4 minutes later: 
The violinist received his first dollar. A woman threw money in the hat and, without stopping, continued to walk. 

At 6 minutes: 
A young man leaned against the wall to listen to him, then looked at his watch and started to walk again. 

At 10 minutes:
A 3-year old boy stopped, but his mother tugged him along hurriedly. The kid stopped to look at the violinist again, but the mother pushed hard and the child continued to walk, turning his head the whole time. This action was repeated by several other children, but every parent - without exception - forced their children to move on quickly.

At 45 minutes:
The musician played continuously. Only 6 people stopped and listened for a short while. About 20 gave money but continued to walk at their normal pace. The man collected a total of $32.

After 1 hour: 
He finished playing and silence took over. No one noticed and no one applauded. There was no recognition at all. 

No one knew this, but the violinist was Joshua Bell, one of the greatest musicians in the world. He played one of the most intricate pieces ever written, with a violin worth $3.5 million dollars. Two days before, Joshua Bell sold-out a theatre in Boston where the seats averaged $100 each to sit and listen to him play the same music.



This is a true story. Joshua Bell, playing incognito in the D.C. Metro Station, was organised by the Washington Post as part of a social experiment about perception, taste and people's priorities. 

This experiment raised several questions: 
  • In a common-place environment, at an inappropriate hour, do we perceive beauty? 
  • If so, do we stop to appreciate it? 
  • Do we recognize talent in an unexpected context?
Worth pondering on this !


Life's Like That !! Enjoy .....



GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED


No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.

When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.

If your sister/brother hits you, don't hit them back. They always catch the second person. 

Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.

You can't trust dogs to watch your food.

Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.

Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time. 

You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk. 

Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.

The best place to be when you're sad is Grandma's lap. 


GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED




Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree.

Wrinkles don't hurt.

Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts.

Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.

Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.

Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.


GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.

Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get. 

When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.

You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster. 

 It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.

Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.

Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone. 


THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE

1) You believe in Santa Claus. 
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus. 


 

Triple Filter Test !!


In ancient Greece (469 - 399 BC), Socrates was widely lauded for his wisdom. 

One day the great philosopher came upon an acquaintance who ran up to him excitedly and said, "Socrates, do you know what I just heard about one of your students?" 

Wait a moment," Socrates replied. "Before you tell me I'd like you to pass a little test. It's called the Triple Filter Test.

"Triple filter?" 

"That's right," Socrates continued. "Before you talk to me about my student let's take a moment to filter what you're going to say. The first filter is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?" 

"No," the man said, "actually I just heard about it and..." 

"All right," said Socrates. "So you don't really know if it's true or not. Now let's try the second filter, the filter of Goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my student something good?" 

"No, on the contrary..." 

"So," Socrates continued, "you want to tell me something bad about him, even though you're not certain it's true?" 

The man shrugged, a little embarrassed. 

Socrates continued. "You may still pass the test though,because there is a third filter - the filter of Usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about my student going to be useful to me?" 

"No, not really..." 

"Well," concluded Socrates, "if what you want to tell me is neither True nor Good nor even Useful, why telling it to me at all?" 

A letter from a father !


I am writing this to you because of 3 reasons:

1. Life, fortune and mishaps are unpredictable; nobody knows how long he lives. Some words are better said early.
2. I am your father, and if I don't tell you these, no one else will.
3. What is written is from experiences (personal and others) that perhaps could save you a lot of unnecessary heartaches?

Remember the following as you go through life:

1. Do not bear grudge towards those who are not good to you. No one has the responsibility of treating you well, except your mother and I. To those who are good to you, you have to treasure it and be thankful, and ALSO you have to be cautious, because, everyone has a motive for every move. When a person is good to you, it does not mean he really likes you. You have to be careful; don't hastily regard him as a real friend.

2. No one is indispensable, nothing in the world that you must possess. Once you understand this idea, it would be easier for you to go through life when people around you don't want you anymore, or when you lose what/whom you love most.

3. Life is short. When you waste your life today, tomorrow you would find that life is leaving you. The earlier you treasure your life, the better you enjoy life.

4. Love is but a transient feeling, and this feeling would fade with time and with one's mood. If your so called loved one leaves you, be patient, time will wash away your aches and sadness. Don't over exaggerate the beauty and sweetness of love, and don't over exaggerate the sadness of falling out of love.

5. A lot of successful people did not receive a good education, that does not mean that you can be successful by not studying hard! Whatever knowledge you gain is your weapon in life. One can go from rags to riches, but one has to start from some rags!

6. I do not expect you to financially support me when I am old, neither would I financially support you for whole life. My responsibility as a supporter ends when you are grown up. After that, you decide whether you want to travel in a public transport or in your limousine, whether rich or poor.

7. You honour your words, but don't expect others to do so. You can be good to people, but don't expect people to be good to you. If you don't understand this, you would end up with unnecessary troubles.

8. There are people who have bought lotteries for umpteen years, but never strike any prize. That shows if you want to be rich, you have to work hard! There is no free lunch!

9. No matter how much time I have with you, let's treasure the time we have together. We do not know if we would meet again in our next life.



Your Dad

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Get Real !!

Rule 1 : Life is not fair - get used to it!

Rule 2 : The world doesn't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.

Rule 3 : You will NOT make $60,000 a year right out of high school. You won't be a vice-president with a car phone until you earn both.


Rule 4 : If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss

 Rule 5 : Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your Grandparents had a different word for burger flipping: They called it opportunity.

Rule 6 : If you mess up, it's not your parents' fault, so don't whine about your mistakes, learn from them.


Rule 7 : Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you thought you were: So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent's generation, try delousing the closet in your own room.


Rule 8 : Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life has not.


Rule 9 : Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you find yourself. Do that on your own time.


Rule 10 : Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.


Rule 11 : Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.


Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Road to happiness

We live in an organised society and from childhood, we are taught and conditioned about what is right and wrong, correct and incorrect. We are taught how to behave, talk, relate to others, be selfless, good-natured, sharing, generous, socially adept, accepting, and more, all considered good qualities. We are also taught to shun bad qualities.

However, since each of us is different, these rules don’t always appeal to us. We are blessed with our own inner guidance system that knows and tells us what we really want, what will make us happy. But before what the soul wants becomes a reality, it has to contend with the mind. Or rather, mindset!

Don’t fall into the trap of archaic mindsets that are regressive just because all you do is emulate those before you, even if they are in the wrong.

The mind, because of its innate nature and thoughts, memories, experiences and imaginations, compels us to behave in a way that has been deemed ‘right’ by others, and not always the way we really want to. Hence, most of us are living shadow lives, dictated and controlled by others, by books, scriptures, doctrines, by dogma and generally, what is politically and socially ‘correct’, all through the mechanism of our own minds. As a result, we are never ourselves, but we are what others want us to be. But it is up to us to use our mind in a manner that best suits us. That is the free will which every one is born with, and is available always.


This situation, where we are and what others want us to be, is often the root cause of our internal conflicts and turmoil, and makes us restless and unhappy. But we rarely know or agree to this fact and seldom accept that the final say or decision in every matter is ours. We usually try to put the blame of our misery on some external person or situation. And we start seeking happiness from some source in the external world, without realising that the basic problem which produces unhappiness lies within us, and unless we address that, no amount of looking outside will help.

In order to break free of regressive mindsets, we need to cultivate awareness, courage and trust. Awareness about the self, about our innermost desires, hopes and worries, is the first step.

The second step is to generate the necessary courage, to put our thoughts into action. If we have only awareness but no courage, it will become more frustrating, for we know what must be done to be happy, but cannot do it. And If we have only courage, we will land up acting brashly and doing many foolish things which will be counter productive.


Happy living, Happy creating !!